The Space Between
by Erithe
Summary: Surana does whatever it takes to get into the Fade to find Alistair with the help of a lot of friends, old and new. She's a wee bit grumpy. ((Inspired by an offhand comment my friend Everhard made))
1. A Furious Wife

_In the space between yes and no, there's a lifetime.  
It's the difference between the path you walk and  
the one you leave behind; it's the gap between who  
you thought you could be and who you really are;  
its the legroom for the lies you'll tell yourself in the future._  
~ Picoult

.

* * *

_All he had to do was keep the damned spider away from the Inquisitor and Hawke as they ran for the rift. He didn't have to survive. He didn't have to _try_ to live through this fight ... but he couldn't make himself stop. Couldn't give up the knowledge that somewhere beyond the Fade, she was waiting for him and they had promised each other that next time would be forever. It didn't matter anymore how afraid he was, or that he hated spiders. It didn't matter when the thing dropped him to his knees, not when he could get back up and fight again. And again. And again._

_He'd fought an Arch Demon. What was a giant spider compared to that? When he saw the flash of the fading rift, he did what any sane person would do. He ran._

* * *

It takes knowledge and will to survive as a warden. Sometimes, it just takes knowing the right person at the right time. On the boat across the Waking Sea, she reminded herself of this as she reread the letters she'd been sent. The one promising hope, even as it described the energies required to rip open a seam between reality and dreams, Morrigan's letter had contained enough information to keep her moving … along with some pithy comments about how her _good_ man had died an _honorable_ death. Leliana's letter had been less infuriating, of course, but it had also been less helpful.

Her horse was covered with foam and sweat by the time she stopped at the inn in the foothills of the Frostbacks to fling gold at the innkeeper for a fresh pair of horses before taking off again. The pounding of hooves into earth as they raced along the road into the mountains felt like the pounding of her heart, winging upward with fury and impatience. She wanted to _be_ there already, to be grabbing someone by the throat and wringing an answer out of them. Why had they left _him_? Of all the people to leave behi… she stopped herself. It was too difficult. Too distracting.

Switching horses halfway through, she made it to Skyhold as the stars were blinking into the black velvet sky overhead. Lights flickered along the walls of the castle and the Inquisitor's banner floated and snapped above the gate. She rode along the causeway toward the gate, dismounting and leading them as she approached the armored men to either side of the open doors.

The gate guard tried to stop her, eying the blowing horses and the furious elf in blue and silver armor with a frown. "I can't just let y'go in there," He said. "State yer business like everybody else. Warden's aren't exactly the most welcome people right now."

Steely gold-green eyes met his, glinting as she said in a cold, clear tone, "Tell _Commander Cullen_ that Surana is here for the Inquisitor and see if he agrees that you should continue to make me wait."

"Ahh ..." He glanced back at the other gate guard and she pushed by him. No more had she passed through the than she had taken her staff from its place at the back of her saddle, handed her horses off to a startled passerby, and headed toward the stairs, taking them two at a time. She reached the front doors of the Great Hall before any of the many guards racing after her could catch up, her boot heels striking the floor in a sharp, staccato rhythm. She paused in front of the throne and turned, glaring at those nearest.

"The Inquisitor. Where is she?"

"Ahhh," the masked Orlesian man nearest her took several steps back and pointed toward one of the doors.

She paused, seeing the guards heading toward her and lifted a brow, her jaw tensing briefly as her fingers flexed on her staff. Everyone nearby shrank back a little, and she turned on her heel and slammed through the door, marching through the empty office and down the hall. Near the end she found a tall, dark haired woman standing with a dwarf, speaking quietly. The dwarf saw her first and straightened, his hand going for the crossbow resting against the wall next to him.

"Hawke?" The elf's voice was sharp, her eyes narrowed to slits.

" Ah, Warden. I turned back from Weisshaupt as soon as I got your note," the Champion answered. "We must have been ahead of you."

"Where is the Inquisitor?"

"In the War Room." Hawke glanced behind the elf, a smile lifting one side of her mouth. "And you've got company."

She turned to face the soldiers aligned behind her. At least one was a chevalier and there were two in Templar armor. Her eyes narrowed and she turned back toward the doors. "If anyone gets in my way …"

"They won't," Hawke said, stepping forward and lifting her hands while Surana shoved open the doors to the War Room. Letting them fall shut behind her with a resounding thud.

* * *

_The Fade was a disgusting place, and there were odd things everywhere. He limped along the twisting pathways, dodging behind breaks in the rocks until he found a good hiding spot behind an old Tevinter statue, tilted at a crazy angle. There was a campfire behind it, and an old bedroll. Binding his wounds as best he could, Alistair leaned his head back against the stones and wondered what happened if you slept when you were physically in the Fade. Would he dream of reality? _

_He looked up at the Breach in the sky, watching as it rotated and spat out lines of green light. At least here he couldn't hear the damned song. _

* * *

At the sight of the Warden, both Cullen and Leliana paused, their faces blanking in shock. Neither able to move before Surana had the Inquisitor shoved across the War Table, map markers and war pieces flying in all directions as she glared down at the other woman, her voice a steady, deadly sound as her gauntleted hands tightened around the human's neck. "My husband _is still_ in the Fade."

"Ysri," Morrigan said, her voice shaken, and Surana glanced upward, the look in her eyes sending the witch back a step. When she looked back at the Inquisitor, she found the human staring at her with a look not of fear, but of wary comprehension. They stared at one another for several beats before anyone spoke.

"I think you can understand how I want him back," Surana bit out each word. There was a sound of drawn steel and she said, without looking. "She'd be dead before you could kill me or stop me, Commander. I recommend you keep very still while your lady and I have discuss the whereabouts of my husband. Where is the rift this …" she grabbed the Inquisitor's left hand and lifted it, "… this can still open?"

"Ysri, let her go," Leliana was pulling her back, hand gentle but firm. "He is lost, my friend."

"He's lost when I have his body in my arms," the elf snapped. "Morrigan believes we could manage it."

The witch shrugged lightly. "Yes, though I don't know why you would want to. The man is -" she stopped abruptly at the look in Surana's eyes and her lips pressed tight together.

"You won't survive leaving this room at the rate you're going," The Inquisitor managed to say, coughing a little as she was released. "Not exactly wonderful for the reputation of Wardens, is it?"

"Ashe," Cullen's voice carried a warning.

"I am not playing _The Game_, right now," Surana snapped, moving forward again, but unable to reach the Inquisitor as stronger arms than Leliana's pulled her back. Hawke held the elf tightly, wincing as a booted foot kicked her in the knee. "_I want my husband back._"

There was a sound of ringing metal in the hallway behind them and Varric said, "Uh … Cassandra, it's kind of a … okay. Well, this is going to go bloody … "

"Seeker," Cullen said, sounding relieved, but the Inquisitor held up a hand, shaking her head while she rubbed at her neck and sat up. "No. I … Alistair was an ally." She sighed and shook her head, pained. "He stayed behind at _my_ request. If there is a chance … _any chance_ to get him back, we should take it. I owe him that."

"But what about the power necessary for such a feat?" Cullen's eyes had gone wide. "You may need that against Corypheus."

Ashe Trevelyan met Ysri Surana's eyes for a long moment, then she turned to look at the Commander, a smile tilting her lips. "You think I wouldn't do the same for you?"

* * *

_He had food in his belt pouch and a skin of water. It wouldn't last long, but if he was careful, he might last a few days. He ate a little cheese and a little bread, drank a mouthful of water and then rested, thinking of Ysri and wishing he'd had a chance to say goodbye. A part of him wondered why he hadn't just let the giant spider have him. At least he'd have been spared the slow death, but ... he hadn't wanted to give her up. Not just yet. Not ever, really._


	2. A Little Dream of Me

_Sweet dreams till sunbeams find you_  
_ Sweet dreams that leave all worries behind you_  
_ But in your dreams whatever they be_  
_ Dream a little dream of me_...

_Sweet dreams, till sunbeams find you_  
_Gotta keep dreaming leave all worries behind you_  
_But in your dreams whatever they be_  
_You gotta make me a promise, promise to me  
_ _You'll dream, dream a little of me_

~ Ella Fitzgerald, _Dream A Little Dream of Me_

.

* * *

_If he dreamed, he didn't recall it when he woke. Eating a little more, he stood and stretched, working out the kinks in his back from sleeping on the stony ground. He could hear things moving in the distance, some large, others smaller, and none of them pleasant sounding. Out of long habit, he cleaned his blade and checked his equipment for damage. Other than the wound in his side, which he'd wrapped, everything seemed all right for now. _

_When he had finished, he made his way out into the long, winding pathways and began to walk. Staying in one place for too long seemed a bad idea, and, if he had any chance at all of escaping, sitting still wouldn't help him find it._

* * *

The candles were flickering in the Inquisitor's chambers near dawn. The Warden was standing on the balcony, shoulders slumped and her hand over her face, the wind catching her pale hair and tossing it across her shoulders. None of those in the room said a word, though the Inquisitor, Ashe, looked up now and then, her brows creasing as she watched the way the elf's frame shivered in the cold wind. Beside her, Morrigan was turning the amulet Dorian had retrieved from Redcliff castle after their adventure in time travel.

"Has she slept recently?" Ashe asked.

"Doubtful. Though sleep is not always restful for a warden," Morrigan answered, setting the amulet down on the desk. "Ysris has ever been resilient, though ..." her eyes drifted toward the balcony and her lips tightened. "I do not like to think what she will do if we cannot succeed in this endeavor."

"I know I couldn't sleep in the same situation," Doran said softly. "Though she should likely make an attempt. What we're about to attempt should not be taken lightly, not if she wishes to rescue him without destroying everything in Skyhold in the process."

It was an ambitious plan Morrigan had presented in the previous evening, involving both Dorian's research with his previous mentor, Alexius, and the use of the eluvian - though she'd presented the last with reservation. It involved more than that, as well, though she'd only said that both the Warden and the Champion's particular skills would be useful to them in gaining the power they would require ... and even the chance that that would work lay squarely in the use of the mark in her own palm.

"I'll talk to her."

"Are you certain?" Morrigan asked, brow lifting. "She might throw you over the rail."

"Not so long as Alistair is in the Fade," Dorian muttered. "I think we've done all we can for the moment. We all need to rest before we make an attempt. The Warden most of all."

Ashe nodded, and made her way out onto the balcony. She was tall enough that the elf's head reached no higher than her chin, which ought to have given her an advantage. Unfortunately, Ysri Surana made up for what she lacked in height with intimidation. When she turned her head to look at the other mage, it took everything Ashe had to maintain eye contact - disconcerting for someone accustomed to Cassandra's glowers.

"Aren't you tired?" she asked, keeping her tone neutral. "You can lie down on my bed, if you want. We'll keep working and get everything together while you sleep."

"I ought to, but I'm not certain I can," Ysri answered, looking away. "I found what I was looking for in the west and was almost to Weisshaupt when I got Leliana's message. I haven't slept since, not for more than a few minutes at a time."

"Then you should lie down before we do something that could have catastrophic consequences if it goes wrong," the Inquisitor recommended, her tone sharper than she'd have liked. Ysri nodded, moving to walk past her, but paused at the doorway, her eyes studying the human's face.

"Why him? Hawke said it was between the two and she _offered_. Not that I'm unhappy to find the Champion still alive, but I have found the Wardens gone from Orlais and my husband left behind in the Fade. I cannot help but think those two incidents related."

"Corypheus can control those carrying the taint of the Blight," Ashe explained, her voice going stiff and formal. She couldn't help it, not with the guilt surging so strongly through her chest. "Adamant was ... a terrible thing. The warden mages had become demons under the command of the Venatori mage, bound by Corypheus to his will-"

"Alistair is no mage," Ysri interrupted, eyes flashing. "He ... he was trying to _fix_ things. So you leave him behind in the Fade - Alistair who ...," her lips twisted and she turned abruptly away. "If you ever want to know what a Warden _ought_ to be, it was him. He gave up everything to be what he was, and ... we were finally going to be free. _Together."_

"I'm sorry," Ashe said, knowing it wasn't enough. "If we can retrieve him, we will. I swear it."

The Warden said nothing else, walking to the bed before dropping down onto it. She looked at no one else, simply pulling off her boots and stretching out over the coverlet, one arm across her eyes.

* * *

_He slept again, having found another hidden place. This time he dreamed a little, though it was a strange dream. He was standing in the center of a garden, people drifting by him like ghosts. A woman in scarlet Chantry robes paused nearby, smiling as she listened to a man with light hair and an Orlesian accent ask her advice. He heard a child laughing, dark haired and pale, eyes flashing as he spoke to a pale haired boy with a large, awkward hat. Others made their way past him, not noticing where he stood. He was a ghost in the garden, invisible, untouchable ... _

_"Where are you?"_

_His heart broke at the sound, and he turned to see Ysri standing on the path, pale hair pulled back from her face. She seemed less spectral than the others, and he caught his breath as her head turned, her eyes searching the space around them. _

_"I'm right here," he whispered, moving toward her. "Maker's breath, I'm right here."_

_"Alistair ..." she closed her eyes as he neared, her hands reaching out and he held his breath. But they skimmed his presence, broke through the space where he stood, unable to reach him. Her face crumpled and she sagged, head dropping. "I can't believe you're gone. I won't."_

_"I'm not," he promised. "I'm still here. Ysri, I'm right here, my love."_

_"It's been too long," she confessed. "They all think me mad with grief. There's no way you could still be alive."_

_He stood as near as he could, drinking in the sight of her, the _sound_ of her as she spoke. He'd not heard that voice for so long, and it was enough to undo him. "Don't give up," he said. "I know you won't. You never have."_

_"I should never have left," she whispered. _

_"It was safer that you did," he answered, wishing she could hear him. "I love you."_

* * *

There was a rose in the locket Ysri wore around her neck. Old and faded, it had survived journeys though the Dark Roads and the battle with the Arch Demon. She took it off only to bathe, and, even then, she kept it near to hand. All through the journey to the west to find the answer, she'd carried it with her, close to her heart. It was in her hand when she woke, curled onto her side on the Inquisitor's bed, tears coursing down her cheeks. She forced herself to breathe, to calm down before she opened her eyes.

He'd been there. In her dream like a spirit of the Fade, but invisible. She'd _felt_ him there - so near she might have touched him.

When she finally lifted her lashes, she found Leliana sitting beside her on the bed, quiet and watchful as always. She was older now with a steely look in her eyes she hadn't had ten years before, but Ysri could still see the girl there, the laughter and determination beneath the surface.

"Are you all right?" Leliana asked.

"No. Not till we find him," Ysri answered, pushing herself into a sitting position. Everything ached and, for the first time in days, she was calm enough to hear that damnable song in the back of her head. "We _will_ find him."

"You do not believe he is dead."

"He isn't. I know he isn't, even though it's mad to believe he's alive." She shook her head. "He was in my dream just now. I felt him."

"Ahh, a dream," Leliana's lip curved to one side.

"Don't tell me you, of all people, are going to dispute putting faith in a dream?" Ysri asked, smiling crookedly.

"I would not dare."


	3. Keeping Promises

Note: _So, for this chapter, I am making things up to suit my purposes :D Magically, I mean. So ... there's that. But anything for true love, right? _

* * *

_._

"_Some people don't understand the promises  
they're making when they make them," I said.  
"Right, of course. But you keep the promise anyway.  
That's what love is. Love is keeping the promise anyway."  
~_ John Green

.

* * *

_Spiders. The big ones with the unpleasant screams. Though he was grateful for the 'small' ones at this point. So long as he never saw the dragon sized arachnid again, it would be too soon. Hunger and pain had worn him down, but long weeks in the Deep Roads, hungry and near mad with lack of sleep, had prepared him for this sort of thing. He worked through the mob of creatures like a farmer reaping wheat, scything through their ranks with practiced strokes. _

_Duncan had told him once, long before he'd ever met Ysri, that a Warden's existence was often painful and dirty, and that glory had little do with it. Alistair leaned on his sword as the last creature fell and tried to rein in his breath, sucking air deep into his lungs. There were creatures now than there had been before he'd slept. The more ground he covered, the better of he'd be ... not that he had any idea where he was going. All that could be hoped is that the path would take him back to her._

* * *

They were arrayed in front of the eluvian, Hawke to the left, then Dorian to the right, followed by the Inquisitor, Morrigan, and Surana. The weird, watery light fell across the half-empty room, distorting their faces as though they stood underwater, the moon high overhead. Solas was to one side, ready to support them should anything go wrong, his excitement ill-concealed behind gleaming eyes. Behind them, Leliana leaned against the wall. She'd had to argue both Cullen and Cassandra in order to keep them outside, and, even now, she glanced toward the door, their voices muffled as the two argued just a few steps beyond.

"I would suggest you do not linger," she murmured, just loud enough that they could hear her. "I do not think the either of our friends would take kindly to the sight of blood magic performed inside Skyhold."

"Cullen Rutherford knows better than to cross me, at this point," the Warden retorted, not taking her eyes from the eluvian. "I've known him since he was a blushing teenager in Kinloch Hold."

"Aren't you younger than he is?" Ashe asked, glancing toward the elf on her right.

"Not where it matters," the warden answered, her jaw tightened. "Though I can give us a little more time now. We just need to _find_ Alistair or none of it matters."

"Right. Well, then we had better begin. Are you ready?" The Inquisitor asked as Hawke and Surana raised silver blades above their palms and Dorian approached the eluvian with Alexius's amulet in his hand. Morrigan lifted her hands, her eyes gleaming with strange lights while she held Surana's locket. Ashe raised the mark as they began to cast the spell they'd cobbled together, each of them praying it would work.

Power swelled as the two mages sliced their palms and blood welled forth, power surging forward only to be trapped in the amulet Dorian held. Sweat broke out on the Tevinter mage's forehead as he focused, channeling the surge of energy forward while Morrigan and the Inquisitor combined their power, using the locket to locate the missing Warden, and guiding the power they'd all summoned into the eluvian. Early on in the casting, there came a surge from the watery, mirrored surface and the witch staggered, her knees going weak, and then something lifted behind them, pulsing forward as Solas stepped up behind them to contain and bolster their work.

The eluvian swirled and gleamed for several seconds before suddenly erupting in blinding light and settling, glowing with a strange, green quality it had not previously possessed. The mages all sighed and released the power one by one, glancing at each other nervously - except, that is, for Surana. Without a glance toward any of the others, she stepped forward - pausing only to look back at Ashe.

"I can go alone, if you'd prefer," she said.

"Shouldn't we at least check to make sure it's safe?" The Inquisitor frowned. "You don't know what's on the other side."

"It won't be the first eluvian I've stepped through," the Warden smiled.

"I'll go," Hawke volunteered at the same time Leliana did, the two looking at one another in surprise. The spymaster shrugged.

"I want the chance to say goodbye if it all goes wrong," Leliana said quietly, her eyes meeting Ysri's across the half-lit room. The elf nodded.

"Leliana, then, and Hawke. Anyone else?"

"I think a better question is 'Who will not be going?'," the Inquisitor answered, looking around. When Leliana looked as though she would protest, Ashe held up a hand. "I'm their only way out if things go poorly."

"The veil is not so thin here as it was at Adamant in the Western Approach," Solas reminded them. "However, it could still be done."

"Morrigan?"

The witch shook her head, handing Melori the locket, "I think I will wait here. You will require _someone_ to run interference when they find you've all gone exploring the Fade ... yet again."

* * *

_Terror demons lashed their long, bony tails as they stalked forward, clicking and jerking each step of the way. He stumbled over a black and broken Tevinter statue, catching his footing only just in time to be knocked flat on his back, rolling out of the way as the creature's dagger life fingers stabbed the ground where he had fallen. He brought his shield up and slammed the thing into the rocks, slicing through it with his blade only to find a wisp at his back, casting bolts of green fire._

_He heard another demon to his right as he faced the wisp, and his heart sank. Too tired, too hungry, and nearly overwhelmed ... "You promised," he hissed to himself. "Even if keeping it does mean going without a proper meal."_

_Alistair thought about having a hot breakfast: cheese on toast, a beef steak, an apple, and maybe a little ale to wash it all down. Though it made him hungrier, the thoughts also calmed him, giving him the patience not to panic - as did the idea that he would have something amusing to tell Ysri later. _

_"Now to survive the next one," he muttered._

* * *

Booted feet slipped and slid over wet rock and they all took a moment to catch their breath, gagging a little on the fetid humors swirling and misting around them. Surana took the lead as they crossed through a broad pace beneath the floating, broken pieces of rock and masonry that turned slowly overhead. The sickening green light of the Breach roiled in the sky and there was the sound, distant but present, of ... things moving. There was a heavy, ominous feeling in the air that grew heavier every moment that passed.

"I hadn't thought I'd be back here so soon," the Inquisitor said, hand on the hilt of her blade. "So, where to first?"

"I don't know." The Warden turned in a slow circle, studying their surroundings. "It's not like the Fade from a dream, but I'm not sure how similar it might be ..." she paused, shrugged, and began walking. "Of course, if we come close enough, I'll know he's there."

"I'm surprised you decided to help us, Solas," Leliana said as they walked deeper along the meandering pathways. "I thought you disliked the wardens."

"I disapprove of their methods," he answered, leaning against his staff as he took in their surroundings. "But it is in all of our interests to keep both Skyhold and the Inquisitor safe."

"Well, that's something," Ashe answered, glancing back at him. "Alistair is one of the reasons I survived our last visit here."

"Then I shall be happy to aid in his release."

"Do you hear that?" Dorian asked, pausing and staring into the distance. "It sounded like something roaring."

"There was a fear demon here ... or part of one," Hawke said, turning to look in the direction he was facing. "It's likely still here."

"Then we should hurry." Surana answered, her lips tightening. "I doubt we have much time."

* * *

_He dragged himself into a crevice between the rocks, shuddering in pain from what had to be a broken arm. He'd lost his shield somewhere behind him and had not had the strength to lift it again. The demon had slammed him into one of the walls before he had killed it, hard enough that he'd felt the bone snap. There were too many now, and he was just the one man. Closing his eyes, he remembered her face from his dream, the way her eyes had gleamed in the light of the garden, how her voice had sounded. _

_"I'm still here," he whispered, wondering if she could hear him in a dream somewhere. He hoped some echo of it would reach her, wherever she was_ _ . "Should have gone with you when you left. I'm sorry, my love. I don't know if I can do this."_

_Somewhere nearby something large moved, and Alistair pulled himself further into his hiding place. He thought about Ysri, his favorite foods ... anything and everything to keep himself distracted. Soon he'd know, one way or another, how it would all end._


	4. In Your Heart

_If there ever comes a day when we can't be together, _  
_ keep me in your heart. I'll stay there forever._  
~ A.A. Milne

.

* * *

The sound of screaming broke through the fetid air, blood and fire raining across the open space between the disjointed walls. Demons died, most of them badly, caught in the crack of ice, the swelling heat of fire, or pinned by a swiftly turned arrow. It was over almost as soon as it began, leaving the Inquisitor to slide her half-drawn, unbloodied blade back into its sheath while she and Dorian simply stared around at the carnage. The Warden, Leliana, and the Champion were already making their way further into the Fade, none of them winded and their armor intact.

The Inquisitor and Dorian glanced at one another, their expressions almost blank with surprise. "No wonder Cassandra was so desperate to get _either_ of those two to help with the Inquisition," Ashe muttered. "We are hopelessly outclassed, my friend."

"I wouldn't say that," the mage answered, though his eyes had gone a little wide. "Though it was undoubtedly impressive."

Solas, who hadn't even bothered to cast through the fight, simply chuckled and shook his head. "It takes time to build such skills."

"Right," Ashe glanced over her shoulder at him and shook her head. "I just wish we had that kind of time. They're already where we need to be."

"And when they were becoming the Hero and the Champion, they were where you are now," the elf said comfortingly. "I suggest we continue before they leave us behind."

* * *

_He was in the garden at Skyhold again, this time walking the pathways at night as the stars glimmered overhead. The bard from the tavern was playing in the gazebo, and the sweet sound filled the air around him. It all seemed clearer now, and he looked for Ysri, passing through the greenery and into the Great Hall, unseen - a ghost among the masks the Orlesian guests wore. But he did not find her there. _

_As he paused in the center of the room, the Commander strode by, his face set into a growling expression that Alistair found familiar - even comforting. Fereldens were given to action and this was a man who had found himself stymied. He followed along in the lion's wake, back through the door to the garden and through it, to another door Alistair had not yet noticed._

_"They have not returned," Cassandra said from her place beside the door. "Morrigan claims she does not know how long it will take, given the nature of traveling to the Fade."_

_"We should have gone with them," Cullen replied, his voice sharp._

_"They have the Hero and the Champion with them," the Seeker answered. "And Leliana, as well. We would have been superfluous, and you know it."_

_He did not hear what they said next. In his elation, Alistair found himself waking in the Fade, groaning at the pain in his arm as he climbed slowly to his feet. The creatures who had been nearby when he had hidden himself were gone now, only the distant sound of them left to remind him they had been there at all. Leaning against the canyon wall, holding his arm against his chest, he gave himself a little room to hope. _

* * *

They broke through yet another line of demons, and, this time, everyone was caught up in the battle. There were no all-knowing voices speaking out of the sky, and no strange vignettes that required solving - it was simple, bloody battling through line after line of demon. The bone-rattling, exhausting kind of work that made up the bread and butter of Warden work. Within a few hours they'd hit a clear patch and jogged along the pathways, looking for signs of real life. When the giant spiders began to crawl over the walls to descend into the open space, everyone groaned, though likely more from boredom than fear.

"This is beginning to remind me of the Deep Roads," Surana called out to Leliana as they worked their way through the biting, hissing creatures, magic flaring on all sides as the four mages worked together while Ashe killed anything that kept moving afterward.

"Long, boring, and terrifying?" Leliana asked, a brow lifting. "I see the resemblance now."

They made their way down another passage, and the Champion, who was walking to one side, paused, nudging something metal over with the toe of her boot. It rolled across the ground and clanged to a halt near Surana's feet, the griffon on the front of the shield glittering wetly up at her.

"Alistair," she gasped, dropping to her knees beside the shield. "He can't be far."

"There's blood here and ..." Hawke moved forward and around an outcropping. "And a dead demon. Several dead demons. We're on the right track."

"If he's lost this, perhaps he was injured?" Leliana suggested. "He would try to go away from the monsters, don't you think?"

"We dare not separate here," Surana answered. "If he is still alive, I should know as soon as we're in range of him. Wardens feel like darkspawn to other wardens, you know."

"Well, that's not at all comforting," Dorian muttered.

* * *

_He sat down to eat, knowing he had little food left but too drained and hurt to deny himself the rest of the bread and cheese, which he ate last. It wasn't _good_ cheese. Good cheese came from Orlais and tasted of herbs and spices, rich cream, and ... he stopped thinking about it with an effort of will. Good cheese was making the current cheese taste like darkspawn spit, and it might possibly be the last he'd ever eat. Sighing, he took a slow bite and chewed it carefully, thinking instead of his wife and her hair, the way she called his name in certain ... uh ... he felt himself blushing and smiled as he chewed the rest of his food. Maker, how had he made it this long without her?_

_His shield would be somewhere down the pathways, he thought. If they came that way, they'd know he'd been there, so he thought to go back and stay near to it. The demons seemed far fewer now - a good sign that help was nearby _or _a bad sign that the big finale was nearly upon him. He'd always found that demons in the Fade seemed to have a tendency toward the operatic. Not that he required anything dramatic and over-powering to finish him off at this stage. He felt like an old man as it was, the injuries tiring him out to the point that his sword seemed remarkably heavy._

_There were voices nearby. He could hear them clearly over the sound of his suddenly thudding heart. Holding his arm tightly to his side, Alistair limped along the passageway and back the way he had come before. There was a blind corner ahead and he took it carefully, edging around to see what lay beyond._

* * *

There were footsteps along the passage ahead of them, loud and heavy. A rattle began that lead into a growl, deep and ominous as it chuckled, the sound shuddering through the ground at their feet . Leliana dropped to a knee and drew her bow while Surana and Hawke readied their spells. What came through the break in the rocks was not a pride demon the size of a small dragon, broad shoulders and many-eyed gaze sweeping over them as it laughed and laughed. Dorian automatically cast a warding over the group and the Inquisitor stepped forward, blade already free of the scabbard.

"Well, this will undoubtedly be a delight," the Tevinter mage said, voice carrying through the damp air.

"Nothing like a little demon mutilation before breakfast," Hawke answered, hands gleaming with scarlet energy as magic began to well around her.

It would have been a difficult battle with only two mages, but four rather evened the odds, especially for Ashe, who was having to keep the damn beast's attention away from Hawke and Surana - both of whom made it rather difficult to ignore them. Heat and ice flared and crashed around her as she crashed again and against into its armor-tough hide, grateful when it began to stagger beneath the blows she dealt to its knees. It was so tall, that was the highest she could reach.

And then a fireball crashed into its head, followed by a bolt of lightning and she threw herself out of the way as the demon wobbled and came crashing down to lie still on the rocks next to her. Panting, she lifted her head to smile at the others, her expression turning to one of horror as something large and gleaming pulled itself from the ground behind the Warden and swept her aside with a gesture. The fear demon cackling as it lifted its hands and began to cast.

* * *

_He ran forward, lifting his blade with one hand as he saw Ysri go flying to the side. It didn't matter that his left arm was useless or that he'd likely broken ribs somewhere along the line. After so long apart, he would be damned if he let this be the end of it now._


	5. Promises Kept

_I close my eyes, thinking that there is nothing like an  
embrace after an absence, nothing like fitting my face  
into the curve of his shoulder and filling my lungs with  
the scent of him. _~ Picoult

.

* * *

The demon was _laughing_, in that horrible, creepy way that demons liked to do - Morrigan sometimes made the same sound when amused at his expense. Growling, he kicked at the thing, surprised and gratified when he heard something snap! in response. Another figure, smaller and topped with flaring black hair, slammed her shield against the creature's side with a respectable amount of force, knocking it sideways and into the rain of fire flaring from a nearby mage's staff. And then, warm green light enveloped his body, healing and soothing what ailed him. Aches and bruises faded, his ribs felt a lot less likely to snap, and, though his arm was certainly still broken, it didn't hurt quite so badly.

"I've got it," Ashe yelled, eyes flashing as she braced against a hail of magical green fire. "Go ... find your wife!"

So he did. The demon protested and spat spells to sap their will, but they were proof against its cunning and brought it to its knees. Alistair heard it fall, but did not bother to look – he had something far better in his sights.

Ysri was tottering to her feet, blood running from her pale hair down the side of her forehead toward her ear. She seemed dizzy yet, eyes blinking as she tried to focus on the approaching figure. Pale hair dangled wetly in her pale face, dark circles ringing bright eyes from lack of sleep and strain. There was a wealth of pain in the lines he could see, in the way she bent with that quick, measured way she had to lift her staff from where it had fallen. All that pain and energy spent for _him –_ how did she still look so beautiful? It was difficult to breathe.

"Ysri?"

Her entire body turned toward him at the sound of his voice, the much-abused staff falling again to the ground as she stepped toward him on wobbly knees. Alistair's sword hit the ground and his good arm came up to wrap around her, pulling her as tight to his chest as he could. He felt face against his neck, tears warm against his skin. It didn't matter that it hurt to hold her or that he had only one arm to do it. His fingers stroked through soft, white hair and he heard her whispering his name.

"Emma lath. Alistair. Creator's help me - I thought I'd lost you."

"Never," he whispered, voice cracking a little. "I knew you would find me. I'm your Prince in the tower, remember?"

"Don't joke," Ysri scolded, though she was laughing through her tears. "You were dead! Everyone knew it."

"Everyone but you, you mean," Alistair smiled, laying kisses along her brow and wherever he could reach. "I've _missed_ you."

"You're hurt." she said, but he held her tight when she tried to move away, and she looked up at him with a lifted brow.

"It's just a scratch," he proclaimed. But Ysri had always known better than to listen to him in such matters, and her hands ran across his body to find any injuries he might be hiding. He stood there happily, rather enjoying the attention until she found the broken arm, face going a little gray around the edges and a curse escaping him.

"Maker's breath … perhaps not so small a thing, after all," he admitted.

"Shall I take a look?" Hawke asked and the two realized they were surrounded. The others were smiling through the muck and grime, leaning on weapons and looking rather satisfied with themselves. Alistair met Hawke's eyes and she shook her head, exasperation lurking behind her grin.

"I'm glad you're not dead." Her tone was dry, her hands

"So am I," He laughed until she took hold of his arm. "Andraste's … knickers …!"

"Alistair!" Leliana exclaimed, laughing. It was just the distraction he needed as the Champion of Kirkwall gave his arm a quick yank and he yelped, swaying on his feet and his eyes bulging until his wife's magic pulsed across his skin and cooled the pain. He wouldn't be using that arm to hold his shield for a while, he thought – not that it mattered. For the moment, he couldn't be happier.

* * *

It was a dirty, disheveled group who left the eluvian to file into the half-empty storage room. The door was open at the other end of the room, and they could see people moving in the courtyard outside. Ashe wasted no time, her boots clicking determinedly as she walked across the empty room. She paused at the doorway and then made an incoherent, mouse-like sound as a tall figure bearing a furry ruff around its shoulders descended on her and dragged the Inquisitor into the light.

"Thank the Maker you're all right," Cullen said, arms still wrapped protectively around the Inquisitor. As the others filed out of the room, his eyes widened at the sight of Alistair and his face paled a little. "I never thought I'd see you alive."

"Meet the right woman and you never have to worry about old Death," Alistair laughed, his eyes meeting Ysri's. Color climbed up his cheeks and he cleared his throat. "I knew she'd find me. Always does."

There came a flash of light and the faint hum of the eluvian ceased, Morrigan's voice behind them laced with mockery, "You always did rely on Ysri to save your hide."

"It's a fine hide," his wife said, dimpling as she turned her head to look back at the apostate with an affectionate smile. "Admit it, Morrigan. You would have been sad to see him lost forever."

"If it gives you gladness, I am happy to have made the effort," the witch sniffed. "Though you all smell of the Fade now."

"It _is_ rather pung-" Leliana began, only to be interrupted as a small, ginger haired figure dashed into the midst of the group.

"Wait. Wait! I need your clothes. All of them. And anything that has ... goop on it. The more goop the better. And ... and skin scrapings! Maybe if we cut all you hair, too ... no offense, Messere Solas."

"None taken, Dagna," the apostate replied, amused. "Though I do not think the garden is the best place for us to disrobe."

"I doubt anyone would mind the view should I choose to indulge," Dorian quipped, tugging his moustache with a devilish glint in his eye.

"Oh, Ancestors no! The baths will do just fine," Dagna answered, giggling nervously. "Just ... don't not do it. I learned so much from the last samples and there will be so _many_ more this time!"

"Dagna?" Ysri and Alistair said at the same time, their eyes a little wide as they stared at her.

"Warden?" the dwarf rocked back on her heels, nearly bouncing in place. "Warden! You ... it's her!" She told Ashe, grabbing the Inquisitor's sleeve and pointing. "That's her! She's the reason I'm ... I'm me!"

"I'd heard you'd done well in your studies, Dagna," Ysri said slowly, a smile tugging at her lips. "But I had no idea you'd be here."

"Dagna is the Inquisition Arcanist," The Inquisitor explained, shaking her head. "I admit, I have trouble keeping up with her."

"Hah hah! Well, _I_ have trouble keeping up with me," the dwarf in question replied.

"I think I need to get Alistair somewhere quiet," Ysri said, feeling her husband sway a little on his feet. "The baths would be excellent about now."

"I ... don't suppose there is any food?" He asked hopefully as the group made their way through the garden. "Something with cheese?"

* * *

A little while later, sitting together in a bath with hot water to their chins, the wardens rested. There were candles around the room, flickering and shuddering in the steamy air, and a fireplace nearby, crackling and snapping warmly. Empty plates of fruit and cheese were stacked on the stone lip of the tub itself, next to a pile of soft towels and a small basket of soaps and oils. Ysri was keeping the water hot with her magic, allowing them to soak away the aches in the herb scented waters.

He'd not stopped touching her since they'd crossed into Skyhold and, now, his hands stroked over damp skin, lips pressed to her neck, her shoulders ... anywhere he could reach, really. He realized, as she turned in the water, in his arms, and he tasted salt on her lips, that she was crying, hot tears pouring from her eyes as though her heart would break.

"You were dead," she wept, shoulders shaking as he held her close, his eyes closing tight. "Everyone knew it. I was almost to Weisshaupt to tell you that I'd found it at long last ... and there were letters waiting for me at one of the way stations. You were dead. Leliana said so. I ... Alistair .."

"Shhh," He whispered. "I'm not. I promise I'm not. How could I leave you like this?"

"What if I hadn't found you? What if the demon had killed you?" She shook her head, shaking in the warm water. "Are you all right? Really all right?"

He smiled, fingers trailing through her hair, his lips catching hers as he pulled her closer, drinking her in as though he would never get enough. When they came up for air, foreheads pressed together, he smiled. "Never better."

.

.

* * *

NOTES:

** Okay, you guys have NO IDEA how hard it was NOT to turn this into a time travel fic. Except I'm not confident I could explain the paradoxes and it would BUG me. But I told Everhard about it and she said "Oh I am torn between eri no! and eri **-yes-" **and then we talked and I thought ... I can't account for all that. My brain is not that big! If they change anything, then maybe Ysri DOESN'T find the warden cure and doesn't come back and then this plot didn't happen ... and ... and ... *brain explodes*

So that's why this isn't a time travel fic. .

BUT IT ALMOST WAS. So if you would want a time travel fic and won't complain about paradox or make me EXPLAIN IT (i won't!), then you can vote in comments or send me a PM. But I might not anyway ... b/c my head hurts now.

*** So, I get to the very end. And my brain is like ... "Oooh, make it all a dream. Have Ysri wake up and discover she fell asleep over Leliana's letter while crying and he's still gone." WHAT THE EVERLOVING HELL? Why? My brain is a bad place. Seriously. I'm so sorry. I apologize for it's terrible behavior. I decided to give you floof instead. So. There you go.


End file.
